Dubh Lin ; the black pool

several days after i arrived at dublin, i wonder why i wanted to go study overseas.

the weather so cold.
the locals look at us af if we're intruding.
the foods so unlike home.
the house so quiet it feels crazy.
the school so far from home.
the classmates all...unfamiliar.

but i arrived with a severe flu and landed with a headache, everything seems negative to me. being just flown halfway across the world to start a new life as a student totally independently puts some pressure on me. everything just seems...serabut.

the house, owh when are we moving in, settling down.
the classes, gosh where do we download where do we print the lecture notes, n y the heck is there a class at 8am??
the groceries, wat do we need, wat else, why isnt there much food in the house, wat is there to eat....i need jajan.. :/

but then.. it rained.

it rained it Dublin and i felt my first splash of Irish rain. felt good. :) we were going back from class and its like 6.30pm n dark n i smiled all the way back with a wet face.
someway, somehow, rain makes me feel happy, giddy, cheerful, smiley....peaceful.
it surprises me that even the rain in this dark dull town gives the same effect to me. i get this magical-ish feeling. haha.

n then from there things change.

groceries bought, kitchen stuff is much more complete, more food, less stress. ;)
extremely increasing appetite. hungry all the time. n trust me thats a good sign.
my flu got better, my mood improved, n better anatomy class experience. how i hate to suck in my mucus with the strong smell of cadaver(-_-!)
eating lots and lots of chocolates evryday. wee~
got used to the mild wind, not so chilly anymore, very, very pleasant autumn breeze.
it so quiet here, you can just grab a book and bury your face in it for long hours without being interrupted.(mind you, non-academic books)
it is such a conducive learning environment altogether.

despite being a dull, cold, boring small town.. i think i love it studying here. there, i said it.

newpostnewpostnewpost! (flyfly)

referring to syarah's comment below which i only read just now.. im writing again NOW! wee.. :D

ok so.. fly matters:

fly matter #1 : brg2 dah siap blom? dah siap packing? kemas btol2. make sure jgn lupe bwk pape.
eerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.............................................................................
mlsnye nak pkir. nape soklan yg same ditanye berkali-kali dan oleh org yg lbeh kurang same. oh sungguh tidak menyenangkan. jwpn: bolehla...sket2(jwpn mls juge). tp alhamdulillah.. sket2 siap juga akhirnya. n rasenye ckup la jugak bwk ape yg ade. nak bli byk2 pon duit dah abes. RM1200, skali tgk mcm byk..mmg mcm air, dh namenye pon duit.
am so fighting with my adventurous travelling nature with my average female normal nature.
jeans nak bwk satu je bleh pkai sminggu dlm mase sminggu konpem pg bli vs i wanna bring my beloved skinny jeans also... ;/
bwk baju 2 helai je multipurpose vs cantikla bju ni nak bwk/baju ni baru bli/baju ni blom pkai
hurm..basically, pkaian jela yg poyo. len2 sume konfem kne bwk. so far 25kg. tp tade grads card..so ken ikut basic limit 20kg. nmpaknye kne kurgkan lg. argh!! mlsnye nak bli grads card. :/


fly matter #2 : jomla hantar aku kat airport. ;D
bende yg paling senang skali nak ulas/tambah bile org tanye bile kite fly, fly mane etc. but honestly..seriously..maybe sbb aku tak pnah anta membe fly kowt? .. i dun really understand the sentimental value of sending ppl off... wat do u do when sending ppl off? tgu je pon kan? nape fes time fly nak org anta rmai2? kali kedue ketige n strosnye ta kesah pon?.. :/(ok sedikit emotionless) but i think im starting to get a hint of it dah di ujung2 nak dkat fly ni. rase cam tharu jek membe dtg smte2 nak anta kite n sanggup tgu dgn kite kat epot tu... (i reckon this is the feeling that one is supposed to feel?) but anyways, flight ku pagi pkul 10.05. masuk gate lbih kurang kol 8. bkn rmai bleh anta. ade klas, test etc...apekan daye. tapi ade gak sorang due yg berhajat nk anta aku. yam and pojie....thanx korang.. syg korang :) (ok sgt unlike aisyah shahrom, whatever..)


fly matter #3: ape perasaan anda nak fly?
honestly.....bese2 je. i thought i'd be excited though. a bit maybe. maybe id feel more emotions mase the day nk fly nnt kot.(again, sedikit(?) emotionless).
most ppl lbeh sdeh dr excited..nak mninggalkan mlaysia frens families n everything. but i still feel bese2 je. org lain parents tlg kmas2 isikan luggage, aku prefer utk handle sendiri n mintak tlg mak abt certain things upon my request. what nature is this.."i prefer to handle things by myself, bia taw2 dah siap je, ma jgn isau2, taw2 da siap je". i think its independence. 9 months will fly by so fast.. i just hope the toughness of medic and rcsi will get my minds off from things that i dun wanna think abt.

fly matter #4: dah blaja msk? abesla ko kat sane msk sendiri.
NO! aku belum blaja msk. oh sungguh mls. nak, tapi... suasana tak kondusif. tak pandai la. mcm mane nak blaja masak dgn mak weh? aku slalu je tgu tepi dapur tu tnye sket2.. slalu je observe.. kmahuan itu ade...tp..bagaimanekah carenye?? ok.. cmni3, ckp2, ok dah siap msk..boleh classify as blaja msk ke tu? klau camtu slalu je bwat. but wateva. im pretty confident in my experimenting skills. my solution: my mum's just gonna write everything in an exercise book, then i'll just follow the instructions. mudah. yg lain2 i'll just learn and discover by experience n tnye kwn2.

okaaaayhh. thats pretty much all the highlights of nak terbang. today is my last day kat jb for this year. tonight is the last night i'll be spending in my beloved comfy bed which i love so much and dearly..bye2 my room, bye2 kucing, bye2 umah, bye2 kg pasir putih, bye2 jb. esok grak kl lpas solat jumaat. moga dipermudahkan sgalenye. Amin~~

ahakz..embarassed max

malu la plak ngn post sdri sblm ni. but im never deleting anything!

anyway, manifesto nite was brilliant! too bad i cant go to yesterday's session. outing..wuu~~..but no matter, as long as i can support and shout to my usrah sis (BESSIMA!!!!), then dats fine enough by me. kot. tho it would be much better if i could. but oh well.

SPR, u guys did great job. this years' manifesto nite was done professionally and i doubt any candidates resent the flow of the event. its well organised, no flaws on ur side.(as far as i can see) CONGRATS! the event was formal, assigned attire was smart, the atmosphere mild, just nice for such event. (well for me that is. im not such an exciting person,la). n u found yourself such good emcees. i could have sworn, everytime he speaks i want to vote for him. hehe..coherent and brilliant. i love the emcees la sng cite. so its a right decision u dont run for mpp. huhu..

Candidates, well u got tough competition this year. everyone is just in such a high spirit they almost blew the audiences away, literally =). caiyok lar! korang mmg care. tabik spring!! bkn senang nak naik atas tu. its not easy to convey ur own idea, from ur head, based on a restricted source(n maybe idea itself), to make people to just listen to you,what more to be convinved. From the bottom of my heart u guys deserves credits and respects. as a person who failed to deliver my manifesto speech in an impressing manner, i admit inferiority. =)

Overall, i enjoy the 2 hours i spent at the back of the hall tonite.hehe..eventhough i wasnt really expecting anything whatever. juz came to support bessi.

1 more thing, audiences, plg tak pon korang stick till the end and ramai lak tuh. Year 2 pon ramai yg dtg. If im one of the candidates, i'd be so grateful, thankful n terharu. walaupun tak layan certain part. (besela audience kmb. what do u expect? everybody will come to see and evaluate what qualities their future leaders have and consider analytically before choosing whom they'll vote? well,quite.... what im trying to say was..."this candidate is capable, charismatic bla3, mst boleh mng." really?i wonder..not all people vote the way u do) in the end i wasnt able to convey whatever im trying to say in the bracket.(-_-!)


dah2..sok nk bgn pg.weeee........tata.

rayarayaraya

weyh! sambutan raye camne? bkn kte ke yang handle?

-takpe.jgn risau.tu org len buat.

org len sape?

-org laen. kite takyah isau.takyah pkir pape.

owh..abestu? kite wat ape? tak wat pape ke???

-iyer!!=D

~(monolog dlmn) bkn ke bnde tu under kite......=(..takpela. biola die.kate gitu. aku dah tnye.








SHIIIITTTTTTTTTTTT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

argghhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!bodow gler!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! nak maki nak maki nak maki nak maki...!!!

---------tgh taip ade org tnye psl raye lak, trase pedasnye.."eyh?bkn korg ke yg handle??"------







-mlm ni ade meeting ngn dak2. takpe ko takyah dtg.

dgn bodo n slambenye dtg gak..sbb..........("eyh??bkn bnde ni under MPP ke?? bkn MPP yg handle ke?? ey asl ko tak taw?? ey..cmni3 ke??? ey..bla3 ke...???")

shit, damn, poo~~yada3.the damn emerging problems lst minute.....stress kpd dak2(dorg yg handle 2). owh.....ttbe MPP,ops, certain mpp plak rase cam mpp handle.(la, camtu ke upe2nye?)

camne ni??dah tu,ape ktorang bleh wat skrg?ape yg ktorang ley tlg?

-takpe nnt ktorng bincang.

nape takleyh nak bincang je skrg.

-takpe nnt ktorg bincang same ktorang.

tak,nak taw cmne sudahnye ni? ape ktorang nak blik dgn? tgn kosong? (stlh menembokkan diri masuk gak stlh ditegah)

...............bzzzz........bzzzzzz.bzbzb...........................bzzzzzzzzz................................krik3..krriikkk....









bodow

"FOOTNOTE"

rather than a typical blog, mine is more like a reminder for myself. like a diary, like just for personal expression given to my personal godbless self. A site where i find pleasure materializing my emotions and expressions, my thoughts and reflections. Though i write very little for reasons as many as those. Really not good in expressing my personal,personal,personal, deep, heart to heart expression. same goes with just personal thoughts.(Not good? I couldnt, even if i want to) It's quite frustrating, being an IB student,not being able to use the alternative of expressing as a means of relief. (-_-!)

my opinion of my own blog may be because nobody reads it.=P.loser gle..! heheh.. so this became kinda private(talk about private.=D).sbb tu la rase cam diari kot??! =).

I dont socialize half as much as i do at secondary school. so no kmbians here. smkajbian? bz with their own life to bother mine.(or is it the other way around? i believe it is). so nobody really bothers to read this stuff. its more or less the same for me anyway. is it? (this im not sure)

sometimes i say some wise stuff(wise for myself at least/most). so i ought to just record it for sometime later in my life. it might be useful.

So, that is why, as lame as it sounds...i'd consider this very blog of mine as a "foot note" of my life. =)