hurmmm...
just trying to dissect the reason as to why i am so effing lazy and procrastinating for almost a month now. please la.. new sem is supposed to be better and more well equipped to cope with, but why the hell is it worse?? and we dont even have half as much lecture as we had during the first month in sem 1. aaaaaaaaaa D:
i feel so shitty, so crappy, so loser-like, feel so lost, am drifting away, where am i now, oh shit, another day passed by, lalala.., yet another, dumdeedum..., and another..........
sooooooo .
needs motivation like URGENTLY asap! >:(
am so angry with myself.
i dunno wats wrong with meeee :( i was so high spirited and semangat last sem and so eager and happy in learning everything, soo happy to be studying medicine. so whyyyyyy?
i deadly seriously think this has to do with the PSQ project that we need to do in a group. in other word, assignment. dang. how will i live the rest of my life like this. proscrastinating over every assignment that pops up in front of me. oh how i long for an eager heart to complete assignments, but i simply accepted that i wasnt born with it. tch. assignment assignment assignment. why do i fear you. what is it that u have that can diminish this poor soul so much to the point that she lose all her self-confidence and esteem and a sense of achievement and a sense of life.... i havent even touched my guitar for 2 weeks now. ;( bile la nak pandai.
i am so lifeless right now. no interest in anything except baking. n dats just so i can procrastinate moore. bake, eat, bake, eat.... graaaahhhhh....
huh, in this post only, i have made so many negative(annoying(pathetic)) sounds.
n yet, even with my hand on the keys pointing out my problem to me, i still dont intend to do much about it. F.
i need... i dunno. D:
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